Tuesday, January 26, 2010

In the doghouse

28"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' 32For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.  (Matthew 6: 28-34)

I realized something this morning, I am much like the pagans mentioned in verse 32 “running after all these things” when my Heavenly Father knows that I need them.

I had a hard time sleeping last night. We have new carpet, which I am very thankful for, and we have a dog, which right now I am trying to be thankful for. The dog is still confused about where she needs to go potty and so she is sleeping in a crate at night. Let me rephrase that, she is sitting in and whining in a crate at night. She needs to learn control, boundaries, and that there is a place for everything, including where that all potty needs to be outside and not on the new carpet.

So she has been whining and crying all night. She doesn’t like her crate and I don’t understand why. It’s comfortable, it’s big enough, it’s warm and dry in the house, and we provide all of her needs, food, water, even a cute sweater if she gets cold (she doesn’t like to wear them), but it doesn’t matter, she doesn’t like where she is during the night, so she cries and whines to get out. And I don’t get any sleep.

So I got up at 3:45 a.m. for the final time and thought, I could spend some one on one time with my heavenly Father, just me and Him for an hour or two before I had to go to work.

And so I walked into the kitchen and then…

I needed to make tea so I put the kettle on, and then I went and got my laptop because I left my Bible out in the car, and then I couldn’t find my journal, so I had to log on to the computer, and I had to check my email, and then I went to check my Facebook, and then I had to check my bank balance, and then I got distracted with the news, and then…

And now it’s 5:30 and I have to be at work in 30 minutes. I got very little time with my Father this morning. I was worrying about what I would eat. I was worrying about what I would drink, and while I wasn’t thinking about what I would wear I was worried about money and would we have enough to cover the rest of the week.

I don’t want to be “like the pagans”. I don’t want to run after all the things of this world, but I do and then I wonder why my soul cries out in the dark just like our puppy in her crate. God wants me to go to Him first. He wants me to give Him the first fruits of everything, including my day and after all He has given me, why do I chose things that are of this world? I want to seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, but the enemy doesn’t want that. Satan will use distractions and business and even good things to keep me from God’s best. I am hearing that over and over again so God really must want to make sure I hear it.

Trinket, our dog, has all of her needs provided for her. She has food and water, shelter, toys; all she has to do is be a dog. We have rules and boundaries that she needs to understand and follow but once she figures them out or maybe I should say, once I figure out how to help her understand and retain them, then we can have a healthy, enjoyable relationship. But right now, she cries and whines and she doesn’t like where she is. She just needs to be obedient and let me know (her master) when she needs something instead of making a mess and having to suffer the consequences. (No, I don’t beat her; don’t get all PETA on me.)

Yeah, wow moment for me too.

My Master wants me to come to Him first. I have to stop putting the world first and wondering why things aren’t working out like I want them to. The world doesn’t care about my wants and desires, or what is best for me because the world doesn’t love, therefore it has no capacity for care. God cares because God loves. It’s just that simple. When I allow all the other “stuff” to interrupt my God time it’s no wonder I have a mess and therefore suffer the consequences. I don’t have to run after anything. I just need to sit with Him and listen and stop whining and crying in the crate but come out and be obedient to my Master and His word and “not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself”.

I’m glad that God doesn’t sleep because I would have kept Him up all night whining and crying from my own crate. He has boundaries to keep us safe, to keep our lives clean and pure, and to help prevent us from making a mess. (Hmmm, sound familiar?) I just need to stop worrying and accept, embrace and learn so that He and I can have the relationship He wants for us to have, the best.

I guess I’ve redefined “being in the doghouse”.

God, I am sorry that I pushed you aside yet again this morning. Help me to be better disciplined with my time and my focus. Keep me from the temptation of the business of this world and all it’s emptiness and instead draw me closer to You because I know that you love me more than the lilies of the field, Your word tells us that and I thank you for loving me enough to give me the boundaries, the rules, and the instruction to keep my life safe and without worry. I love you God. Amen.


Anonymous said...

Thank you daughter, I needed that this morning. You are such a blessing.


Anonymous said...

Love this, Leigh ! Why is it so easy to get distracted ?? I struggle with this , too . I get in my own way... because God , He's right there waiting patiently for me ~to stop running around chasing my own tail!! We know that when we spend time with God even in the midst of all of the business , he holds back all of the to do lists ~all of our worries big and small!

Love you
Stephanie :)

Anonymous said...

I am so blessed that I have a wife that can turn an event that could leave her upset and angry for the rest of the day, into a life lesson from God that she can learn from and share with others.

Thank you again, for saying "I do"